Me: (watching and being severely traumatized by The OA on #Netflix hears the man of the house open the dishwasher door-ALERT! ALERT! Nothing good can come of that noise!)
Him: (snobby chuckle while looking inside the dishwasher)
Me: (now traumatized and fuming) Yes…?
Him: (continuing to snobbishly chuckle…)
Me: Oh, so you think there’s a problem? (please note The OA is still playing and has not been paused #multitaskingfemale)
Him: (dead calm)
Me: (two can play this game)…….
Him: (silence)
Me: (absolutely bursting) It’s fine! It’s fine the way it is. Do not touch anything inside that dishwasher!
Him: (snooty laughter starts up again while he rearranges my dishes in the bottom of my dishwasher)
Me: (now must focus so have paused the apple tv) Happy? They don’t come clean when you rearrange my work! It’s like the dishwasher rebels after you give it the once over. Do not touch…please…(regaining some sense of decorum and manners)…
Him: (deftly changing the subject) So, are you caught up to me in The OA yet, Miss-fall-asleep-every time-we-turn-on-Netflix?
Me: (launches couch pillow at him)